dear wigleaf,

my neighbor is a real big  _____. last week, she taped another note to my apartment door—the second this month—which read: SOMEONE WALKS VERY HEAVILY, AND I CAN HEAR THOSE STEPS BACK AND FORTH ALL NIGHT. PLS WALK SOFTLY AND DON'T MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE. naturally, i listened to myself walking around each room of my apartment, but my steps didn't hammer-pound or thud. then, i asked some of my friends & all they did was tease me. well, they said, your feet never stopped being teen size, so it would make sense for them to be rebellious. to make matters worse, my dad told me over the phone the other day i wear loud! clothing—that explained why a decomposing man followed me around the grocery store. now, i'm wondering if i really am noisy & just don't know it. i think my feet are sensitive to all these thoughts because i caught myself walking around my apartment on my tippy-toes. how is that a way to live in your own home? how is that a way to live with your own body, in a constant state of sneaking? i know my feet will quiet until this problem is solved, so i'm thinking of inviting my neighbor over. i'll show her that there are no anthills in my apartment i'm stomping out at night, & i'll probably give her a gift card, which hopefully she'll use for earplugs or a sound machine. is that a good idea? or should i pound pound the floor for hours, until she comes running & screaming, beats on my door boldly, just to have a dramatic showdown, just so i can tell her—she can't take away my loudness, i earned it. some of us live our whole lives trying to become heavy, not soft, quiet, a thing that slips away that no one notices. she'd probably attack me or call the cops after listening, so maybe i'll just try to go to sleep at a normal hour. who needs to be awake till 5 in the morning, just for the sake of it?

jj



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