Unusual Deaths
Sebastian Castillo


He kissed his moonlight reflection on the river and drowned. He was covered in shit and eaten alive by dogs. He gorged on mercury. They roasted him alive on a grill: "Turn me over," he said, "I'm done on this side." They pushed a horn into his anus. They sewed him into his bed and his bed caught fire. He held his urine at the dinner table. He laughed. He ate a 14-course dinner. They punched him in the stomach. His equipment broke. He was hit by a stray fire extinguisher. He wouldn't eat anything that wasn't cooked by his wife. He walked into a helicopter. He stood too close to cacti. He exploded. He was wrong about the glass. He was trampled by hay. A statue impaled him. He was cooking something that was still alive. They threw scarves and hats at him. He committed suicide because he had bad manners. He drank the blood of a bull. He jumped into a volcano to prove something. They exposed him to insects for 17 days. They gave him a bad toothpick. He studied too hard. They rubbed teeth on his body. He was stabbed while shitting. His throne collapsed. He tripped over a pig. He drowned in a barrel of wine. He acted his role. They crushed him with a coffin. He bit his tongue. He was killed by a water hammer explosion during routine maintenance on the SL-1 nuclear reactor in Idaho. He was outside of the Earth. He drank carrot juice. He was reduced to 60 centimeters. He had sex on a piano. He responded to a golf club incorrectly. A cannibal ate him, after which the cannibal gave up meat for good. They made him rob a bank. He was demonstrating his product. He was looking for his phone in all the wrong places. He sniffed bread. He slipped on an orange peel. He stepped on his own beard.


.





Sebastian Castillo is the author of 49 VENEZUELAN NOVELS. He lives in New York.

(Text derived from wiki.)

Detail of Secondlife graphic on main page courtesy of Halfwraith.





W i g l e a f               04-11-19                                [home]