My book is about the hilarious way my meth dealer asked my weed dealer to marry him. It also has some great recipes to help lower your salt intake. My book is about why my favorite Roomba won't stop having sex with my favorite geode. The structure of the book is loosely based on the board game Scattegories. It's also loosely structured around the board game Apples to Apples. The original title for my book was "Applegories," but that title didn't test well, so I went back to the original title "Scat Apples" but then I looked online and found out what a Scat Apple actually was and so now I am back to my original-original title which was "A Girl Named Sandy Touched My Shoulder And Now My Shoulder Smells Like A Taco." My book is about the moat I'm building around my house and the moat I'm building around my moat. There is nothing about my third marriage in my book because that wound is too fresh, but there is an entire chapter devoted to my first wife and how she loved to Scat Apple me while we watched my favorite Roomba and my favorite geode screw. Did I mention that my book has a great recipe for low-salt chicken enchiladas? Ultimately, my book is about the triumph of human spirit and unless your heart is an unfeeling muscle, like a vagina or a foot, you will cry your stupid eyes out when you read it.