Driving Home, I Imagined the Man I'd Just Met, Alone in His Apartment, Washing By Hand the Glass from which I'd Drunk
Doug Paul Case
This was after I rolled the windows down, hoping rushing wind would rid
my clothes of his cologne. This was after I slid into my car, having
barely opened the door, as if I were afraid his neighbors would spot
me. This was after we said awkward goodbyes at his door—me on
the stoop; him, still naked, inside. This was after I got dressed. This
was after he asked if I wanted to hop in the shower and I asked for a
damp towel instead. This was after the hand job which could only be
described as adequate.
This was after he said, "It's just not going to happen." This was
after, somehow, he'd deflated. This was after it appeared it would
happen, as he kneeled over me, condom on, stone-faced. This was after I
whispered, "Damn," because—and let's be honest—it
was the biggest dick I'd ever seen. This was after we stripped, kissing
beside the bed. This was after I put my water on his beside table, next
to pocket change, lube, and a box of condoms. This was after I sipped.
This was after he said, "I'm being such a bad host," before pouring me
a glass of water. This was after he showed me his bedroom. This was
after he asked if I wanted to talk first and I said, "I'm good." This
was after he let me in. This was after I knocked on his door, having
reassured myself on the walk from the car that this would be the
release, the pressure I needed. This was after I got lost on the way.
This was after I told him, "Maybe an hour," when he asked when I'd get
there. This was after we emailed about what we were into. This was
after I responded to his ad: Professor-Type Seeks Student. This was
after I decided I needed to try something different. This was after I
spent two weeks wondering. This was after you left.
Doug Paul Case recently earned his BFA in writing, literature, and
publishing from Emerson College, where he edited The Emerson Review.
His short fiction has appeared in Annalemma, PANK, Word Riot
others. He is an MFA candidate in poetry at Indiana University.
Detail of art on main page courtesy
Detail of art on main page courtesy of DJOXFUTURA.