A Mayonnaise Is Not Brown
Krammer Abrahams

Boots Walking in America thought of what it takes to be a man in a calm world. He looked at his penis and said, "I'm a dick." He did not touch his penis. His hands were dirty. He would be eating a sandwich soon. He could see a store up the road. He would be eating a sandwich in the store up the road. A woman named Cynthia would make his sandwich. He enjoyed the shape of her trimmed nails as she put her fingers on the vegetables he would set inside his mouth. She wore plastic gloves. Her earrings were made of a sort of whale bone. The people who worked at the store wouldn't make him wash his hands before he ate his sandwich but he would. He did not need anyone to tell him when he should wash his hands.

The floor was brown.

"Someone should wash the floor," thought Boots Walking in America. A mommy told her child not to babynoise the lunch hour. The baby was not a full grown man so it would have been wrong for Boots Walking in America to beat on the child. The woman named Cynthia wrapped up the sandwich and then Boots Walking in America unwrapped it. He was a big object and his dick did not concern him much at all while he ate lunch with his dirty hands. Boots Walking in America wasn't sure how he forgot to wash his hands. There was a good amount of mayonnaise leaking off the bread on to his chin and wrists. He looked at Cynthia. He was a little bitter that she put so much mayonnaise on his sandwich. Boots Walking in America smeared the mayonnaise on his shirt. He remembered napkins. He wiped his shirt with a napkin. He did not pout. A mommy was being nasty with her voice toward her baby object. She verbally diminished her own child's ability. Boots Walking in America sucked on mayonnaise and remained calm.

Krammer Abrahams has had stories in Everyday Genius, elimae, Lamination Colony, Action, Yes and others.

To link to this story directly: http://wigleaf.com/201102brown.htm

Detail of photo on main page courtesy of LeoDrawings.

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